sorry,

about the post yesterday, me and my mom have been having a lot of fights lately.
A lot.
About everything.
Everything.

She's always been in almost full control of my entire life, its overly stressful and really just pisses me off.
Sometimes I like to keep secrets, but she demands I tell her everything.

Yesterday I went for a walk, to the next town over, then back, when i came home I was bombarded with questions.
'Where did you go?, do you know what time it is?, don't you have school tomorrow?, Were you with someone?'

I know mothers worry, I know parents worry, I know people worry but it was getting ridiculous.
I always answer the same was, I always have, well until the one walk where I get on the ferry, but anyways.

'I went around town, no I don't know 9:30 maybe, No mom i told you I'm done school, No I'm never with someone I've always walked alone.'

"Did you go to Bruce's house?"
You see Bruce is a new worker up at the store, I'll admit he's sort of cute but I have no will or desire to date anyone  at this time in my life, nor do I even WANT to fall in love(something I do too easily).
"No I never"

She raised her eyebrow in a questioning sense
"Humm, are you sure?"

"I just told you NO mom...Jeeze"
She didn't believe me, I wouldn't lie to her about something like that.

Then she said that I'm not acting like I usually do, I've changed.
Oh really, well lets see I'm turning 17 in two days so yeah you COULD possibly say I've changed a little.

but just a little.

Oh did I forget to mention that there's a guy, you know no face, black tie and suit, white undershirt, stands at least oh you know eight maybe nine feet tall, possibly wants to kill me? Also there's another 'thing' inside me who periodically takes control and kills people, and there's little followers of the big no face man who have attacked me.

Silly me, mom, my bad.

Nope, none of that that could have possibly changed me, well guess its puberty after all.

Next to that I'm lonely.
No other runners(around here), just me, no one else around here see's slenderman, just me.
Guess I can't just wait for someone to come here grab my arm and take me with them I'll have to go looking on my own.

I don't want to run alone, but I'm sure I'll have to.
I've asked for a bag for my B-day its a hunting bag.
I'll be packing.

Then.

Ill be leaving.

As About God.
God, I love you, I want to serve you, but to have someone plan out steps as to what I would have to do scares me, I know right from wrong, but being human I will mess up, I wouldn't do wrong on free will.

So help me?
Lead me?
Because i'm never going to have the strength on my own.

Dreaming.

-I_L