Safe with Mystery.

Mystery picked me up, she seems like such a lovely person I hope I can become close to her without anything happening. I really do, maybe I can become close to everyone that's in the group too I do feel horrible though for not talking it's just as of now I'm scared to maybe its because I don't really know them or perhaps because I never really become close to anyone anymore.

All these feelings mix together it's causing me to become somewhat ill to the point where I can't eat properly, 

although I'm hungry I don't want to ask for anything.

And I remember I was very quiet, I've never been one for holding up conversations, maybe that's why my mother told me I would never keep or make any friends.

Once we got to the house I remember climbing onto the second story to watch the stars, I didn't want to move or talk or anything just sit and watch the stars in silence.

The stars are amazing, they shine no matter what and they keep shining and when they die they create new stars and they don't judge they are beautiful.

What was I thinking anyways, running with the Dollmaker, if something happens I don't want to have to wake up with anyone dying in my hands how would I live with myself.

I'm happy to be off the streets though, that's somewhere I do NOT belong it's cold, you get hungry and the streets are hard to rest on. Anything could have happened to me, what a foolish mistake just bolting out of that truck I wonder where the driver was anyways.

I do remember one thing when passing by the newspaper stands trying to find out where I was and I feel stupid for not posting this sooner, a police man was being accused of murdering a fellow cop apparently it was a gruesome murder.

I think it was at the same office I was dragged into, do you think maybe I may have...NO I refuse to believe I did that!

The last part I read was that he pleaded not guilty, he said it felt as if he had no control over his body, like someone was using him.

I don't think that will hold up well in court, I don't know about the US but in Canada it always seems to be a short time in jail, five years I believe, then patrol for another year or so.

I couldn't sleep, not unusual for me but tonight I was just more restless, A new place far away from my family I looked at my wrist where the letters HoPE were scarred into my skin.

I kept holding my hand's up gazing at the stars through my fingers 'how far away I am from heaven' was all I thought at that moment.

Mystery is very kind, I thank her for what she's doing for me.I'm very happy to have met her, I hope I can enjoy it around here.

This place were in is also very nice, I enjoy it, although I want to start looking around for places tomorrow I can hide in and be alone, there must be a nice few around here.

I think I'll just rest for now.

-I_L